Hi, i know you probably dont wanna hear from me anytime soon, if even ever. I dont know if I should send you a message because i know your life is easier without me in it, when I think back of the ways if treated you i feel sick to my stomach... Iv'e come to terms with the fact that i have hurt you one to many times. and its just best if i leave you alone. But I just can't stop myself from thinking about you, you are special to me and have always been.. Everytime things get serious I run away because im scared i'll never be enough. Well i actually made it up with my self that i wasn't gonna contact you again, but I just couldn't help myself, now we've been talking for 9 hours straight and it feels like nothing's changed, its funny how you always make me feel comfortable and relaxed, nobody really gets me like you do. I am so so sorry for all the times i have dissapered from your life, and I know you dont want another sorry, it doesn't mean anything.. I'm not asking for another chance or anything like that, I just really don't wanna go on like this, without you

My heart was bleeding when I was reading your last message.
it fucking kills me that iv'e hurt you so much in the past, it's not like i didnt know but what
hurts the most is that you feel like your the one to blame for some of it, it was never you.
ive fuckt you up time and time again and ive probably made you hurt more than ive made you happy
and it just hurts so much that the person your supposed to love and cherish u end up hurting
ive made you feel insecure about how i really feel about you, i can tell you i love you and there is always a bit of doubt
i cant escape that fact. I think the reason i keep coming back is because it's always been you.
Nobody makes me feel the way you do, thinking about you gets my blood boiling, its like there is nobody else than you
its just me and you in our own world, nothing else matters. You are so special to me, you've always been, i dont always know
why i do what i do, but right now i REALLY do know what im doing. Im here, here for you, to be with you, i aint going nowhere i aint going leave you
I know it's not gonna fix all the wrongs ive done in the past, but i'm gonna do whatever is in my power to really make you belive me
I know its not gonna happen overnight, i know there's gonna be bad times, but im gonna keep fighting for us
I wanna meet your mamma, i wanna be reason you smile, i wanna give you butterflies i want you to be able to think about me and us and smile instead
of hurting. You said you really hope that everything is gonna make sense some day, I can truly say
the only thing that makes sense in my world rn is you, the way you make me feel is more real than anything.
We've been talking the past week for most of the day and iv'e been more happy than ive been in god knows how long
You might be better off without me, you probably are better off without me at the end of the day
But I really hope i can change that, its gonna take time. But the time i got i wanna spend with you, always.
I love you, when our eyes lock in I hope some of the doubt you got in your heart will dissapear, but until then i will do whatever i can.
No more sad tears, i wanna make you cry of happiness