Unsent Messages

ik u will probably never see this so here i am ig. i wish u had wanted to ruin our friendship too. i keep hoping for the day when u will turn around and tell me u changed ur mind because i think we could have loved each other. but rationally ik u probably wont ever like me back so i have to try and move on (even though moving on from you is so much harder than any other crush ive had you idiot). part of me wonders if i will always care about you this much, it sure feels like it rn; but still, u dont like me that way and i respect that. i never want to destroy our friendship by trying too hard to have u love me back. u mean so much to me and while it hurts knowing that i will never get to learn those stupid tiny things about u that lovers learn, i could be content just seeing u smile. after all that is how i realised i liked u. u laughed in that stupid green sweater and that was it.