Unsent Messages

You know, when we first ended everything- whatever we were- I used to see you everywhere. I used to be in grocery stores and resturants and movies and every single guy with dark hair who stood a little taller than everyone else, I could have sworn that he was you. I would convince myself that by some miracle we would be brought together again. Though it never was you and when that hit me, it was like I couldn't breathe. it was like I thought I was going to fall apart. Then a lot of time passed and I could see things clearly again. I saw how badly we treated each other, I saw how you didn't love me at all, and I saw how you knew that I was hurt, and you just didn't care. I still see those tall, brown haired boys in passing but now I'm okay that it's not you and never will be. Better than okay. Instead of falling apart, I feel a little relieved. Kind of like what people mean when they say you duck and just barely "dodge a bullet."