I swear I said I would never end up like my parents and I’m not going to start now. I want a healthy relationship. The thing that scares me most is investing time with someone for years, having kids just to separate and have my kids end up like I did growing up. Parents that feuded and fought over their kids. I was a troubled kid because of it.. brainwashed from garbage rap music. I had so much resentment and anger at the world because of it. And an ego to match. There are reasons why I am me and why I left a lot of things behind. I feel you misunderstand this part of me.