Unsent Messages

Not that you would be able to read this but, this is the last one I'll be writing about you on here.


You see, I've written a bunch of these about you. Not that you are my first love, but because writing here helped me with the sadness I felt.

You easily became a best friend to me, Matt. Seeing our old conversations from before makes me so happy because I can see how interested we both were. But over time, I lost you. I know that I'm just some random person you met online and I don't have the right to probably be sad over this but I let you in to my life. I took a chance on our friendship even if I was so scared right from the start.

What hurts me the most is looking back at all the things you told me, was it all just a trap? To keep me in your orbit? You say one thing yet act the other way. I never tell you every time I get sad over something you did/say because I know how petty it might sound to you.

This is me saying goodbye. It took everything in me to do this, please remember that. But I can't keep going if everyday, I see you losing interest. I'm the only one trying, Matt. I feel and look so stupid continuously wishing it would just get better in a blink of an eye.

I know there's someone else. I told my mom everything. Yeah, it hurts that much. I'm sorry.