Unsent Messages

writing another one bc i can't get my mind off you. why did you fucking leave me? i don't understand i know i hurt you but you have alway hurt me, making me chase after you. I texted you a whole paragraph asking if we could start over and you fucking posted it. you humiliated me. your the reason i don't want to open up to people in fear they leave me. fuck you. i hate you so much. i can't bear the fact that your not in my life anymore so i hate you. i have to. you don't care obviously i was a pawn to your game. I flipped you off the other day because i had to convince you that i hated you. i don't want you to know i miss you. well the person i used to know. who was so kind to me and always there. i wasted so much fucking time on you. for what? for me to get hurt and hoping for every chance for you to text me? god i wanted to text you so badly on your birthday or asking how you were. it hurts me so fucking much and it shouldn't. so in the small chance you see this, i still care. i don't think i'll ever stop. you were my fucking best friend and now your just a stranger. i hope your happy with what you did. i found a new group of friends. they make me really happy. in case you wanted to know im doing good. but ill become weak at the thought of you and come crumbling down. but i have to stop. im done with you constantly ruining me even if you arent my friend anymore. so this is my last message to you. i hope you see this but if you don't then it feels good to let it out. i cried a bit when i wrote this but im going to be okay. thank you for the memories and the experiences. i wish you the best. goodbye t