Unsent Messages

I’m so happy for you. I’m serious. I’m really glad that he’s interested in you and that everything that you’ve wanted is coming for you right now. You’re my best friend, and I know I’m supposed to be supportive and guide you- but I need to get something off my chest. I’m jealous. It’s not you that I’m jealous of, but the concept that no matter how hard I try, no one likes me for me. And not to make this a me thing, but I just want to let this all out before I blow up at you for something you didn’t even do. None of this is your fault, absolutely none. I just... I just wish people saw behind the exterior. I wish I wasn’t just the “funny friend”, you know? For once, I want to be the “pretty friend”. I feel like every day I need to make everyone crack up because that’s the only reason why they stick around. It hurts the most when they don’t land, because I fail at the only thing that’s keeping me afloat. What am I if I’m not humorous? Genuinely, what am I? Maybe that’s why I’m jealous. Because someone likes you for the entirety of you. I’m happy for you. Seriously. I’m so, so, so happy for you. Really, I am. I hope everything goes well for you and that you get what you deserve; upmost love and care. You deserve the world.