Unsent Messages

I miss you so much, I miss the old Jacob, the one I used to be best friends with and love talking to everyday, the one that sat next to me on the bus every single day, the one I went to football games with, the one who’s mom loved seeing me because she knew I’d always have your back, the one that texted me every morning to see if I’d be in school because you knew I got sick a lot, the one that stayed on FaceTime with me for hours helping me with homework, the one that always defended me in fights, the one I loved so badly that when I wasn’t around you my heart physically ached. But I guess I lost that Jacob a long time ago, I still love you with my whole hearth even though you aren’t the same, I knew you’d change eventually but I didn’t think you’d become like this, you became the kid that if the less popular person was walking in the hall you’d trip them, you’re two faced, mean, a horrible person that I still love and won’t stop loving till the day I die. All I’m saying is you’ve changed Jacob, and not for the good, I really hope you realize before it’s too late that everyone misses the old Jacob, the sweet, kind, helpful, considerate, respectful, Jacob I know and love. You’ll probably never see this and probably won’t even realize who it is writing this but I miss you and really want you back in my life. Every night I prayed to god that you’d stay in my life for good for once and every time, you found a way to back out and leave me shattered every time. It seems like once I finally get over the heart break you cause, you come back and cause another one. I don’t know why I’m so attached to you, I should realize by now that you aren’t good for me but you’re like my drug, the one I can’t stop taking, the one that eases my pain, the one that makes me feel whole, the one that shines light on all my rainy days, the one that makes me think true love is real. I truly do think we’re soulmates and we belong together because both of us bring out the best in each other. I love you and can’t wait to see you in school again. I love you Jacob-a kid you’ll probably never talk to again