Unsent Messages

i still look for your name in my notifactions knowing damn well you didnt reach out. you always leave when i need you the most and then come back acting as if you actually love me, dont lie. im still hoping and praying you will come back, maybe you wont, thats what im scared of. im so in love with you it hurts, i would choose you in every lifetime but you couldnt even choose me in this one. why am i not enough for you, you said you loved me and wanted to marry me.. where did that go? did you fall out of love? if you did, why couldnt you tell me, you just block me and post some petty shit and me have to figure it out myself.. eventually i was petty back but, i didnt mean it. i dont want it to be the end, its not only up to me tho is it? nope. i changed for you, i got help. ive been so excited to tell you im overcoming my past so i can give you what youve been needing. but i guess someone else can give that to you. we were coming up on 1 year :( i love you more than anything, i love you to death rj.