Unsent Messages

Fuck you, honest to god fuck you. I’m so fucking angry at you because we made a promise that above all, we would be friends. You’re the one who brought up hanging out back on the island. You’re the one who said to come to your house whenever. You’re the one who promised to be there until you realized being there required effort. The last day I saw you and all you said before you left was see you around wtf is that about? You are lying to yourself and me if you’re going to sit here and tell me this meant nothing to you. Congrats, you ruined the fucking friendship. I was in your bed having a full-blown panic attack trying to hide it, and instead, you made me feel like shit about it and proceeded to bang your head into a pillow and tell me to either calm down or go back to my dorm. You made me feel bad about something that was literally out of my control. You knew that the day before I was assaulted and my roommate literally confessed her feelings for me. I don’t expect you to have to take care of me, and I’ve made that abundantly clear, but if you had just let me sit there, I would have calmed down. It was a hard fucking day, and somehow you were the worst part of it. The way you handled everything sucked ass, and I know you’re going to boot camp, but that’s no excuse to be a shitty person. Just because you’re leaving and you close yourself off all of a sudden, it doesn’t excuse the fact that you hurt somebody and left without trying to minimize the damage. So congrats, I hope the sex was good. I want to be really clear that this isn't me being mad at you because I caught feelings, and I expect you to feel the same and not be a piece of shit. This is me being upset because we said above all we were friends and would stay friends. You ruined the friendship when you first kissed me and slowly chipped away at me ever since. Anyone with two eyes knew that you clearly cared about me. All your friends told me. How wrong were they? I gave you an out. You could have told me, let’s be friends since I’m going to boot camp, and I would have fully accepted that. Instead, you couldn’t handle it all and pushed me away. Well, congrats, you accomplished ur goal. You probably won’t respond to this text, and I’ll probably be labeled as crazy or whatever other adjectives you think fits. So, in that case, have fun at boot camp and have a nice life. Good to know I’ll just be another body on your roster. So take care. Sincerely whatever number under 10 that I am.