bruh y r we even alive like on god what do we have to live for like actually tho mayb u onto sumn everybody says it gets better but u are right every year it j keeps on getting worse n worse i understand now too idk man. christian was like stay alive for kiddos n shit but having a family n kids j means u fr cant kill urself then otherwise u fuck up other lives so rn is like the ideal time to go bye bye but obviously i won’t do that so wtf now truly wtf we gon do now. where do we go from here. i j wanna start over but this is supposed to b me starting over in pa so i rly am the problem i won’t find happiness anywhere bc i’m the issue . hm.