Unsent Messages

it took me over two years to realize this and today for whatever reason (probs the overthinking lol) anywaysss, i loved who we were as people before i had to go... but since then i needed something, someone to hold on to, and i loved you so i chose you. but while i was there thinking, creating, dreaming, you weren’t you. that makes no sense but to me it’s my a answer. the one i’ve been looking for. i think it got hard for me because we have both changed a lot and the version i created was different then my reality. not you. regardless of whether or not you have any ill feelings towards me i know myself and i know i still love you. but this love is different not like i believed in “love” to begin with anyways lmfao. but this one makes sense. i care about you a lot and your family. but it wasn’t love. i’m sorry i was so caught up in my feelings and took it so personally that i couldn’t stand to hear you out when you told me about everything that has transpired these past 2 years if yk what i mean. we were never ready for all of that. there’s things you and i both know we have kept from eachother that needs healing. i c u still are too. fighting everyday, and that’s okay. i have my own demons i’m fighting rn. everybody does as we both know. but at the end of the day we crossed paths for a reason and i learned maybe i taught? idk even if not the best reasons at least it’s something. always here to help or talk if u want (friendly tho). haha nah but fr i guess that’s a wrap. ly always ?