I'm sorry, we have such a love-hate relationship sometimes it's confusing. Some days I love you and want to spend every day doing all the things we always said we would do together. Other days I wonder how I let myself get this deep into with you. It's scary because I don't want to let you go because I know on the days where things are good I'll miss you too much. You're my best friend even when we both don't want to be. I feel like I don't even know you anymore and were holding on to how things used to be with us. We don’t even go to each other when we're going through something. It’s weird and off putting. I take responsibility for my part in that. I’ve hurt you probably as much or more than you’ve hurt me. It’s crazy. I never thought we would come to this. I thought we were gonna be the cool hot best friends; when really were strangers holding on to the past. I don't want to stop being your friend and I really want to make thing work. I can't do that if I feel like I can't talk to you, why do you think I’m writing on this instead of talking to you. I’m just so sorry, from the bottom of my heart, I'm sorry. I know sorry is just a word but it’s the only thing I can say considering how much I’ve hurt you and you’ve hurt me. We struggle with a lot of the same things yet we are so different in personality and in just how messed up we are. I try to reach out but you just shut me out, I’m not blaming you considering but sometimes it get old so I shut you out too. You see what I mean were not good for each other. The truth is I’m scared of letting you go because being friends with you means we don't have to grow up yet, not yet not ever as long as we’re friends. I’m so scared Mia, I don't want to have to let you go because without you I feel like I’m missing something because when it’s good its so good. It feels like us against everyone, and then one of us just isn't in it anymore. We keep going in circles but I feel like I know you but I don't. Mia, I’m so sorry, I'm sorry I'm not brave enough to let you go.