Unsent Messages

Blue your favorite color. I look back at some of the shit ive said to you and/or about you. I now understand i was just mad and hurt. That still doesnt excuse the things i said about you. I couldve been a better friend and i really should have told someone about your eating disorder because that couldve helped you so much you wouldve hated me but for your health i would have risked it. You will never know how much you meant to me and i guess thats for the best because only god knows how horrible we wouldve been together. By no means am i saying i wouldnt have enjoyed us together im just saying we get too caught up in our own shit that it makes it hard to function together. I keep trying to understand why you do some of the things you do and ive never really figured it out. Ive only ever asked one thing of you and thats to love me back. I guess the sayings true you cant make someone love you if they dont. I guess for me this is a farewell message and a i hope life turns around for you message. I know youve struggled and i really and truly hope it gets better. theres nothing more i want for you. When you texted me the other day it really settled all the thoughts running around in my head. i wish you would text me again i really do miss you and thats so dumb because what do i have to miss. who am i to miss you? How stupid can i be, how stupid do i have to be to keep doing these things over and over again. I just wanted to say good bye i guess good bye to the memories and the love. I guess it was only me who felt it.