Unsent Messages

I don't do relationships or feelings, so when I tried with you...it was real. I knew it was real because when I let you go, my heart hurt a little. Most of my life has been me trying to recover from things that I keep to myself. I silence thoughts because I am too nervous to talk about them. I'm trying to release pain and sadness that I hide with a smile. I'm trying to heal. If I was never the perfect girl, you should have left me alone like I asked. My friend asked if I still liked you. I said of course but I will never be able to look at you the same again. He said, if I still liked you, I would be able to look past everything. I figured out that I don't like you...not anymore but I will never be able to like someone else like you. He finally asked the big question...will I ever talk to you again? No, the last time I would text you would be on your birthday and for an amazing New Year! That is the last time you would hear from me. Some say it's painful to wait for someone but I think the most painful thing is to move on when you have so much love for that person. I had so much love for you. I would love to say maybe one day, we will meet again but I know that should not happen, but one day I hope we can explain to each other what really happened. Now, live your best life and I hope you do all the things you wanted to do.