i’ve wrote so many of these and this is most likely gonna be my last one. since i refuse to go and text you and tell u myself since you’re not worth telling. this is my goodbye, we never got a goodbye but this is how i’m saying goodbye. u may see this one day or u may not. i’m saying goodbye for my own good. i’m tired of holding on for u, hoping that you’d change, waiting for the “what if’s” you’re not coming back. no matter how badly i want you to. you hurt me so badly. and i still love you. i wish i didn’t. you have no idea how hard it is to get over u but i’m trying. i’m gonna block you bc i cannot stand trying to look at your social media accs all the time. it’s too late. when u realize how much i actually meant and that u fucked up it’ll be too late. i have so many questions that are unanswered and i have to live with that. i have to live with that maybe the entire thing was a lie and u were just using me to get over ur ex. then when u didn’t need me anymore u left. i’m worth more than that. i hope one day you’ll realize and change. deep down i know you’re a good person adrian. but you fucked up. i probably didn’t even mean anything to you, u lost interest and u don’t care abt me. especially not in the way i cared about you. and that’s okay. i always love harder than everyone else. i don’t hate you. i wish i could. i still love you. i still care abt you. i’m not breaking my promises by blocking u. it’s simply just gonna help me move on. u already broke all of ur promises. i’m gonna say this for the final and last time. i loved you. i loved the way you spammed my phone to get my attention, the late night paragraphs, your smile, how you had a soft spot, how u were so caring, i trusted you with any and everything, your nose was adorable, your laugh and giggle was so adorable, your sleepy voice, constantly asking me for voice messages or for me to tell u stories, when we played mc and stayed silent for an hour but i loved knowing u were right there. i was too scared to start convos or say anything weird which was why i was so quiet all the time. i loved how u were so overprotective and respectful, so sweet and kind. after all that i’m still not the one you want. that’s okay. i’m only saying all of this bc i need to finally let go and move on. you probably think this is so unnecessary and that i’m overreacting and being needy but i really got so attached to you. you were my favorite person, favorite everything and u became apart of my daily routine. you were a lesson. it’s gonna be 2 months since it’s been over and i need to fully let go and move on. this is goodbye. i wish you the best, i hope you end up so happy, someone who treats you good, and who you treat good aswell. i want you to be happy adrian. i’d never wanna see you hurt. seeing u upset always made me upset. oh and i loved stayed up with you late at night knowing you were the only one i was talking to. please treat the next girl right. we never dated but it felt like we did. you played me. it’s okay though i forgive you. but i’ll never forget. we can’t be friends we can’t be anything. it’s over. i’ll never forget you, i’ll still always have love for you and care for you but it’ll slowly fade. i want nothing but the best for you. i think i’m over you and i’ve stopped missing you, i just miss what we had now. i wish that i wouldn’t immediately run and text u back if u apologized and said u missed me. which is why i’m blocking you. don’t get me wrong. you’re too late. you’ll come back when i’m fully over you and then i’ll have to get hurt all over again. i’m not willing to get hurt again. i hope you’re okay and doing well. bye muffin. (if you think this is directed to you i wrote all of these in dark purple, purple always reminded me of you)