I didn’t know it then but I always felt we were more than friends. How could I, we were just middle schoolers back then but I wanted to hold your hand when we would walk home together, just the two of us, and I wanted you to be my first kiss so bad. I would take the long way home just so I could spend more time with you. I would plan my outfits with you in mind and the disappointment whenever you weren’t in class that day was unbearable. And every time our eyes would meet across the classroom, my cheeks would start blushing because I wondered if you were thinking about me the way I thought of you. I thought about you every day for three whole years. And yet I hated you. I hated you for making me feel things I felt were wrong. I hated seeing you to talk to other girls that weren’t me. But now when I think of you, I think of you fondly. I’m sorry if my immaturity caused you any pain. Even if I didn't know it then, you were my first love and I wish you nothing but the best. We lost all connection but please know that a part of me still hopes we’ll run into each other on the street and I’ll get to stare into your eyes one more time.