Unsent Messages

You know when you dont understand the difference between loving someone romantically or platonically? Yeah. I dont want to fuck you but id really like to hold your hand? And i know i shouldnt be so dependent on someone so far away nut like you said- we're obsessed with eachother. I know youre attached to me now, but occasionally i have to fight off the memory that you left me before? Not only left, but left for someone else? Its coming back now because it hurts so badly that you spoke to her again, and didnt tell me, althiugh i know i have no right to know. I hate living eith the fear that you could so easily go back to her, and i saw a post about if you stood in a crowded room who would you run to and it kills me that i know you would run straight to her. I dont understand why you would come back to me when shes still there, and i hate that im getting so attached to you again and i remeber how much it hurt last time. I tried to forget you with loads of other guys but now we talk again i know they dont compare at all? I shouldnt be this dependant on you i know, but i almost believe you when you say you feel the same until i remember that YOU LEFT. I know deep down we wont last, but when you go back to her at least ill have our texts, and your letters to remember the boy i cared about more than myself.