Unsent Messages

You’ve been engaged twice sense we have dated. You knew my fears yet proceed to make them a reality perhaps It was just selfish of me to think in the end it would be you and I. I’ve had many men I’ve lost count propose to me or make a proposal of some kind. A promise to have me as that someone for the rest if their lives. Of course naturally it had made me excited and feel that joy every little girl wishes of although at the end of the day it wasn’t you. I didn’t want to live throughout my dreams with anyone else and maybe that is my fault.
You see I don’t mind if your happy, not at all. It really isn’t that the fact that you may be living out my dreams with someone else. I understand it could be something you want too. Its the fact that you didn’t want to try with me. You never once messaged me from your stand point. I was running around with a broken soul thinking no one had yet to notice. You did. I never knew.
My brain thinks too fast for my fingers to keep up my eyes are drenched and I will forever say this is stupid and I won’t give you the satisfaction of my sweet words and knowing the things I’d never say to you. I’ll keep it at whatever this is.