Unsent Messages

hi maya. hopefully u don’t know this site. idk if it would be appropriate to talk to u about anything I’m writing because it’s been so long since weve seen eachother, but it’s always been in the back of my mind and i just want to write it somewhere.

I’ve compared every single girl I’ve dated to you. i have always had the what if’s in the back of my mind. i miss you, last time we saw eachother we were both going through a really hard time and I just hope you’re not depressed anymore. i never changed my phone number because i didn’t want to risk you not having it if you had no one to call and u needed someone to talk to. even if we never see eachother again, i would be so unbelievably devastated if something happened to you. even though my first “girlfriend” was your “best” friend, i can wholeheartedly say you were always my first love in every way. I’ve still never trusted anyone like i did with you growing up. i don’t know how you truly feel anymore, but i just wanna put it out there that i will always be here for you, hope you’re taking care of yourself, and that i love you. If you completely moved on and if you think you know who this is, just please ignore it. I’m writing this to get it off my chest. I just know for me, i never really moved on for some reason and I’ve always had you in the back of my heart. I guess i never got closure, and i really just can’t open up anymore to the point where I’ve given up on the idea of being with anyone.