Unsent Messages

i cant belive how much time i wasted on you. it was like 2 and half years. and i didnt mean shit to u i wish i could go back in time. and u know what kills me the most is that i was fine before i met u. and while i stil loved u but u idndt like me i had so many chances ttaht i didnt take because i still loved you, wow. and now im just so tired. so fucking tired of waking up every day. its so hard, i feel like theres no one to be there for me. i always try to be there for anyone and everyone but its so hard to stay alive. i lost intreseted in staying alive. someone told me that. and omg i realted so much but i helped him instead of saying "same" that guy doesnt even like me anymore. i put in so much time and effort to people that dont even like me anymore and its so fusturating. i dont know y i love so quickly. and idk why i would ever tell u this ig but i think its bcuz u made me like this. i loved u so fuckign much man. i wish i said so much more when i had the chance but now its like we are just friends that are friends bcuz we have the same friends. u dont even think about me, its so annoying how i care so much. and soemthing is going good in my life but no its not anymore. i just cant stop thinking. i want something good to happen to me.i cant even cry anymore. im so numb sometimes. u made me love and care for anyone to much idekwhy u would do that i dont know how to explain anything u did to me idk if u ever thinnk about me idk how to explain anuthing im feeling rn all i want is a hug life gets so hard people expcet somuch for me it makes me not wanna be here anymore. i cant control my feelings too anymore, theres this new guy (btw im telling u this bcuz before i cauhgt feelings we were bestfriends and this is something i would tell u) anyways i like this kid sm but ofc hes talking to someone, but he legit flirted w me and eveyrthing like cmon man u couldve told me something before. and before that i liked this kid and ofc the prettier bettergirl came and stole him for me ig. life is so fucking boring. i feel like im trapped, i wake up in the same position everyday. ur the one that i loved and even tho u never felt thesame i will never forgot. idek what this is, its all over the place, i dont get it. i dont get anything,, i tried so hard for u. i still do, icare so much like omg stop.