Unsent Messages

I still think about you, it’s so fucking cliche but you still invade my thoughts all the time. it’s been so long and i still go back to those long texts in my notes and remember the hurt. at least with the hurt you were still there. i hadn’t seen you in awhile and when I did it shocked me. we didn’t even say anything directly to each other really, just conversed with the people around us, pointedly ignoring each other, like we were strangers, like it had never happened and i almost wish that was the case. then i wouldn’t have this constant weight on my chest, this voice pleading in my head to just fucking get over it. it was so stupid how much that stupid fucking phrase hurt me, it was a weird stupid inside joke between us, “sorry for party rocking” a fucking lmfao song. we’d use it in place of all “sorries” and for some reason it was just so funny to us. i remember laughing with you until it hurt about that, a fucking lmfao song and all somebody said in that group one day was a “sorry” that vaguely followed the notes from the song and we looked at each other and sung it. so fucking stupid that that is what did it for me, what made me realized how much i missed you. a stupid fucking lmfao song.