Unsent Messages

i hope to God you don't find this. but if you do just listen. i miss you. i miss our friendship. i miss they way you would mess around with me in art class. i miss they way you always asked how i was doing, or asked if everything was ok. i miss your happy smile and your silly laugh. i miss they way you'd send me the dumbest pictures. i miss they way you would always take my phone and take a crazy amount of pictures of my, even though i hated it at the time. i miss the way you remembered the little things, like my dunkin order or my doctors appointment from the day before. i miss the way you always found away to make me feel included in anything, even if i didn't belong. i miss the way you desperately tried to convince me to get a stupid game on my phone. i miss your brain. god you were so smart and it made me so mad how you never had to try. i miss the little things you did, like always making sure your hair was in place or the way you grabbed the straps of your backpack or even the way your face lit up and got red when you were laughing. even though you probably don't know, you helped me get back some of my confidence. telling me to not care about what people though and just do what i want. coming from you, it meant everything. i don't know why, but it just did. even when you upset me, you made sure to apologize and made sure i knew it. you probably wouldn't remember half of these things but honestly, who cares? i wonder, could we ever become friends again? i hope it wasn't my fault that we had a falling out. i truly had all good intentions but if i did something wrong, i'm sorry. maybe it was for the better. who knows. but i just really hope one day we can be friends again. i miss you ronny.