Unsent Messages

Maybe you remember the weird nickname, maybe you don’t. Your memory haunts me, it’s been 5 years and your memory still lingers within the deepest parts of my mind. Sometimes I wonder if maybe all this time apart is so we can heal to come together again. I don’t know maybe that shits lame. But I just can’t tell if I still love you or the idea of you. I know I fucked up. I know I apologize too much. But I’ve never been more sorry in my entire life than when I hurt you. It’s been 5 years and I’ve never met anyone else like you. I really loved you. You’re still here in my daily routine, fuck you’re in every Coldplay song I listen to. And I listen to them to just remember the feeling of you. The safest moments of my life were spent in the comfort of you. Maybe it wasn’t our time. I agree it wasn’t the right time. And I’m sorry I didn’t accept that sooner, I’m sorry for apologizing, but I’ve changed. Maybe I needed time to be better for you. And who knows, but we’ll know. And you’ll find me again. I would give up everything just to hear your voice. But that would also mean giving up on myself and I can’t do that again. I want this again, I can’t shake the idea of not having you in my life. Whenever you’re ready, I’m here. Maybe we are just acquaintances, or maybe we’re just still healing. Either way, I will always love you. Even if you hate me still, David. I will always love you.