Unsent Messages

I miss you. I think I really do, I miss feeling better around you and not thinking about myself. I miss the way you would steal my water and we would end up sharing the ice at the bottom of the cup. I miss the way you would stay up with me all night and forget to take your contacts out and your eyes would be sore. I miss lying with you and playing with your hair while you lay on me pretending like it was comfortable. I think about when I was resting on you and you said "I like it the other way" and decided to be the one receiving the cuddles. I like how you would take my hoodie and the way it fit you better than me. I miss how you would come and sit on my bed and say your stories with the look in your eyes when I would laugh. I'm scared you don't like me, you just want to have somebody that likes you. I think about that night and you hugged me like I was going to disappear, like you needed it. You put all your weight on my shoulders and let me hold your soul in its truest form. I went to leave and you said "I really like you" and it felt more genuine than "I love you' ever could. You put ur hands on my neck and kissed me on the forehead, but I had already turned away. I wish I hadn't. I think about you replying to a photo "You're too pretty" and I don't think you even remember but it made me smile. I think about how different it would be if I kissed you back. I'm so sorry, but you would think it's for the best. You tucked my hair behind my ear and looked at my face as I fell asleep and then your lips were so gentle. I'm scared because I don't know how you feel.