From: ABC
To: Orel
Date: December 5, 2020, 11:40 pm
I’m back here again.
I just can’t get over you, it’s crazy.
On the one hand, you make me feel like shit because I know you just used me. Or at least at first you loved me, then you used me...
But on the other hand, I miss who you were. Who you were when you loved me, who I thought you would be forever. And I just can’t get over you.
No one understands, because no one knows how much you truly loved me and made me feel loved. And safe. And wanted. And beautiful. And happy. And so many other things.
I don’t think it’s healthy for me to be with you now, but maybe soon? Maybe when you want something real and are ready to give me that? I’ll be here, you know.
Well - I might find someone who treats me right by then. So maybe I won’t be available for you right away... but maybe soon after.
Either way - if I’m single or not - I will always be there for you.
You were my first love, I can’t just ignore that...
What I’m trying to say is that I know that you and I are not meant to be right now, but it could very well be a case of “right person, wrong time”.
So I’ll be here for you, no matter how.
I’m angry at you and at the things you did to me, but on the other hand I still love you and always will.
And that’s why I make all these decisions, about what I do with you and our connection...
I love you.
Forever and always?