Unsent Messages

i want u to know, that long message was not me. no matter how much a hated a person i wouldn’t go so far to say something like that. but i don’t understand. i don’t understand why i just got dropped. your only explanation was “i cbf w u saying i love u and checking up on me”. i don’t understand. did you only start talking to me because leah has a new “yellow”? and you knew you were mine? i was sick of you thinking i was pathetic and couldn’t stand my ground. i was only “cocky” because i didn’t know how else to not seem like a little girl because i’m not and i did stand my ground and i’m proud i did. i’m sorry if i was “cocky” but i’m not sorry for anything else. i’m not sorry for checking up on you, that’s just what decent human beings do. i couldn’t even think, what could i do different? like what was i supposed to do different. and how do i know that i can trust it when you said you love me because u said you never meant anything you said, that might’ve just been you saying that in the moment idk. but i don’t hate you, i cant hate someone i love that much. but i don’t understand