i wonder if you look at these messages searching for one from me, as i look for messages from you. deep down i probably know that you won't ever read these messages, or even search for messages from me. sometimes i wish you'd text me out of the blue saying you'd wanna talk again. sometimes i wanna do that, but im always scared to. i've made a lot of mistakes and im learning from each and every one of them. I always hope that you're doing okay.