From: ABC
To: Robbie
Date: October 2, 2020, 5:11 am
i have a lot to say and not so much time to say it. i'm so afraid of feelings. im so afraid of feeling like i need someone. i hate when people try to help me. i hate when people think i need help. i want people to think that im strong enough to do everything on my own. i guess im not. im not gonna say i need you. im gonna say i want you. and i can't stop thinking about you. and i hate that. because it scares me. you never make me feel dumb. you never make me feel weak or like i need you. and i dont think you want me to need you. i want to take things further but im scared of where we go from there. im sorry i was cold to you today. i couldnt get you out of my head and it freaked me out. i thought that if i distanced myself i wouldn't think about you as much. but that didn't work. i guess what im trying to say is that whatever we have scares me, but losing you scares me more.