Unsent Messages

I chose you over a friendship. You know you came between me and R, and you still pitted us against each other, going from me to him when you were bored and using us both for a few weeks at most... it was toxic as fuck, but I loved it. Ever since our very first science lesson I’ve wanted you, no matter how fucking messed up it would’ve been. I would’ve tried to give you support, or find you help. I would’ve held your hands until they were so numb you couldn’t do anything to yourself. God Celine, I wanted you so bad that I still would’ve gone for it in a heart beat after you and R. He told me that you and him were never serious too - are you ever serious with anyone? Do you love? Do you want to love? Or do you still go through men in the mindset that you could make anyone do anything for you if you asked them? Cal said he thinks it’s a way you feel a level of control; don’t you know you’ve had control over me since the second I laid eyes on you? You’re not a bad person; I know that you’re incredible, so why do you treat the world and yourself like it needs punishing for the way you turned out? Your only flaw, is your mind - and even that id give anything to be on. I’m sorry nobody was there when things started getting bad, you deserved more, and you probably would’ve been okay now.