Unsent Messages

We clicked. I was comfortable with you. I still cannot say your name without crying, at least a little dude. When I remember you, I try not to think about the tears but I think about your smile, your laugh, your eyes, and the way you looked at me. I know you looked at me lol. I didn't have to pretend to be anything when I was with you. I would do anything to have you back again, but I realized if that's what you wanted, you would have done it. Till this today, when I think about you, it hurts my heart. I keep saying this is going to be my last stupid sappy message, but I can't stop. I feel like I am waiting for you. I know I told you this a thousand times, but I have never felt this way before, I know I am not your first anything but if the friendship was real, what happened? Anyway, I hope you are enjoying your New Year, even if you decide to never text or ft me again lol :(