Unsent Messages

i hope you see this.
you were the worst. you hated everything i liked you wouldn't even give my music a try you'd call it lame or gay and hate on it. all the hours we talked on the phone and id tell you about what was going on in my life you didn't care not even a bit. you'd say can you talk about something intresting? that hurt! and then the not talking to me id ask you to call and you'd say no i think we didn't talk for 2 weeks on top of you never texting me first why why did i put all this time and energy into someone who really wouldn't care about me till it was over? you know before those last texts were sent i made a list of what you were doing to me and my mind i came up with 10 reasons. 10 reasons as to why i wasn't happy and yet i still am in love with you? i didn't want to end it and i still don't but i think for my sake it was the best.
its tough making that decision it really is but i knew once i started feeling so low to the point where i started hurting myself physically and mental it was over. seeing the scars on my body everyday and knowing its because of you makes me sick. and the days after were the worst pain i've ever been in but why do i still think about you? what do you want from me?