Unsent messages to R.W.S

I hate that you led me on for 6 months, i hate myself for believing everything you said, i hate the fact that you left and didnt turn around that night when i did. Most nights im crying my eyes out thinking about you and everything we did and everything you said. I am so so broken. But what i hate the most is that even though i say i hate you, i dont. Bc if i hated you i wouldnt want you this much, i wouldnt miss you this much.