I don't know what I'm doing or why I chose to write to you. I usually come on here when I'm upset or angry. I think its because some part of me wants you to feel my pain. At least the perfect imaginary version of you in my head can show empathy or some form of emotion that isn't just fake nice because I called you out once in 2nd year.

I don't know what to do. I thought cutting you off would work, but you didn't cut me off back. Now I'm confused and I miss you

I don't even know where to begin. This is a mess. I am sorry that it is weird between us and I understand I am to blame. I just feel really let down because I genuinely thought you were great and now idk how I feel anymore. I am trying so hard to reach out to you but you make it so difficult and consequently I get upset. I hope we can move past this.

I miss you, please just message me ://
I know I've given you the expectation to not message first but I really wish you would just reach out - even as a coursemate

I guess it wasn’t really your fault. I should’ve left sooner, but you filled a part of me I never realized needed filled. I know I shouldn’t, but I still miss you. You left a mark on everything. I can’t even look at chickens anymore without missing you. My little brother misses yours by the way. Too bad it had to end like this. I’ll remember you forever.

Finnian, I need to let you go. But I can't seem to shake the feeling it could've worked if I didn't make any mistakes.

I think about texting you all the time but then that just reminds me that I’m the only one who puts effort in. I wish you could show me that you genuinely cared or just cut me off because I hate this.

I keep wondering about our next conversation or if we’ll even meet again. If that happens I’ve thought about avoiding you because I’m scared I’ll say something stupid and it will backfire

I keep wondering about our next conversation or if we’ll even meet again. If that happens I’ve thought about avoiding you because I’m scared I’ll say something stupid and it will backfire

I tried to re-read our text messages but I couldn't. The level of embarrassment is unmatched. The disparity between my texts and yours. It's so obvious you don't want to talk to me so why didn't you man up and just say it.

I guess why I write these is because I can never talk to you in person, if that was the case I would simply run away. The version of you in my head is so much better than real life. Some part of me hopes that you will find these but if it doesn't then I just hope that its a phase of my life that I can leave behind.

I think you're the only man who truly knows who I am. I love you.

hi future me !!! hope you’re doing better :P

I’m sorry that I couldn’t love you. I’m too young for you. You’re gonna go far, Finn.

You hurt me more than words could describe, and continue to hurt me even though we no longer talk.