hey, you may never see this, but i just wanted to say i love you. Everything about you makes me light up, just hearing your name makes my heart pound. every time our group hangs out i’m always wondering if you’ll show up, and when you do, you just brighten up the room, or at least to me you do. i know things are hard right now, i don’t know exactly how you feel, but i wish you didn’t have to go through all of it. if i could i would drive to you every time you’re down and take you wherever you want to at least try and distract you from your mind for a while. i know a relationship is probably the last thing you need but i can’t help but try. i’m obsessed with every bit of you, from the way you walk to the way you talk. when we hang out, it you i always want to be around. even if we don’t talk, i’m just happy you’re there. if i’m not in the mood and someone calls me i just make up an excuse to not answer (that’s a little mean i know), but if it’s you, i will always answer. always. i just wish you could think that you’re capable of love. i know you are, but it’s always the assholes that get to have you. i just wanna show you the love that you’ve deserved. i promise i could treat you so much better than them, especially him. i want to fucking punch him for what he did. god fuck him. i know i messed up and you may never like me again, but it just hurts so bad knowing that i actually did that to you. i still can’t forgive myself for it, i don’t know how you let me back in your life, but i thank you for having one of the kindest hearts i have ever came across in a friend. i really want to tell you i’m in love with you, but i don’t know what you’ll say. it scares me, but my heart is yours.

I will always love you. I am sorry.